When disliking isn’t a strong enough emotion

People will often say they hate someone who has a different set of views than them. Rather than getting angry at people who don’t share the same opinion as you, use the conversation as an opportunity to understand each other. Sometimes it takes stepping into the other person’s shoes to fully understand why they have a certain set of beliefs. It could be anything from how they were brought up to a personal experience they had. Anger and hate can be a consequence of lack of understanding.

Help someone understand your point and listen to theirs. Being open is super important because once you push away people who have different views than you, it can make them feel more passionate on their beliefs. The act of judging multiple people who share common interests and understandings equals generalizations. You can dislike something a country stands for or a law that is enforced in a specific state, but don’t generalize  that area and then hate everyone in it without getting to know them or their personal values.

However, sometimes hate can be justified to some people. Often times we feel bad for “hating” someone because others say we should not. But ultimately, to hate or not to hate is our choice as people. We feel things that sometimes others do not, and we should not have to feel bad for having those feelings. Most of the time we do not feel bad for loving someone, so why should feel bad for hating someone or something? It is one of our emotions, and to ignore that would be maybe just as harmful as holding grudges.

Everyone feels emotions – that’s just how we work – but how we choose to express them reflects on who we are as a person. If you don’t care about a public figure, an ex or a former friend, why bother following them on social media or asking people about them? It’s because deep down you want to know what they’re doing. You can only hate people you care about, at least a little. Hate is a dangerous expression, so when writing people on your hate list, be careful who you write down, because you might hate something they did or say, but you might not hate them entirely as a person.

While hate is a perfectly normal emotion, holding grudges about certain topics can be unhealthy. Although it might seem like what the person did was unforgivable, with time, most things can be forgiven. Once you move on and let go of hate, it can be a huge relief. Hating someone can take a lot more energy than it’s worth. Rather than holding on to that anger, find ways to spread love. There is already so much hate in the world, don’t add to it.

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