Dear Reader,

When it comes to love, things are not always simple. We have little control over our feelings, which complicates matters such as developing a crush. So how do you express your feelings to your crush? Again, I tell you this is not going to be easy.

I myself am an extroverted, outgoing and confident person, but when it comes to matters such as fessing up about a secret crush, even I find my nerves getting the best of me. Although there is nothing I can prescribe to make things easier, perhaps considering the following will help you finally make the leap.

I think it is important to recognize that you admire this person for a reason. Identify that reason and use it to your advantage. Take what you know about your crush and turn it into an opportunity to express your adoration. For example, if you like your crush because they are part of the same cooking club on campus, ask during the next meeting if they want to hang out and make dinner together. Whatever draws you to a person is likely to be something you can easily connect to them through. Think about that when deciding how to approach the matter.

Photo by: William Wrobel

Photo by: William Wrobel

If you developed a crush on a close friend, you probably already know how to communicate with this person. Although there are particular difficulties that come from crushing on a friend, at least you know many specific things about them that you can use to help talk about your feelings. If you are trying to convey to a friend that your feelings have evolved, I recommend thinking about what you could do as a particularly romantic gesture. If your crush loves to read, perhaps buy them a copy of your favorite book and write a personalized message expressing your feelings on the inside cover.

If your crush loves the outdoors, organize a picnic. When it comes down to it, the best person to decide how to tell a crush about your feelings is you. I can only recommend generalizations such as, make it personal, make it clear and realize that there are much worse things in life than rejection. The regret of never admitting your feelings is far worse than finding out your crush doesn’t love you back.

However, I realize that sometimes we crush on people we do not know particularly well. This makes things a bit trickier. While a common approach is to go through your crush’s friend, I think it means more for people to own their feelings. If you have a crush on the Starbucks barista, perhaps next time you stop by you could buy them a coffee. If you like someone in class but have never had the courage to say hello, kick it old school and pass them a note. I know it seems cheesy, but often the best love stories start with a cheesy confession.

When it comes to telling a crush how you feel, it is necessary to keep it real. Avoid impersonal approaches such as text messaging, Facebook comments or sending a friend to do it for you. Be brave and use personal touches to create a truly unique experience. Regardless of whether they feel the same way too, I am certain that your gesture of love will not be a complete fail. Now go out and tell that special someone just how you feel.

Yours,

Arline